Hobo Sounds 2

The West End is full of private garbage pick-up (thank god b/c of the current civil strike). Surely the residents of my building are not smarter than the rest of my fellow West Enders…why are you idiots not locking up your garbage bins? Surely you are woken up several times a night by the rumbles of stolen shopping trolleys full of wine bottles, the constant bickering over who owns the bin and the squabbling over that tres cool tv tray behind the grey house. I work in the morning as I am sure you do too. We would all sleep better if you would lock up your goddamn garbage bins so that the hobos would move along to some other unsuspecting hood and keep them awake.

Leaving on a jet plane…once I sort out these fees

So the man and I are going on a much deserved trip at the end of November. Me being the planning nazi that I am booked the flights well ahead of time. I paid for the flights in full and was charged a 150$ fee by the travel agency for her time and effort, fine whatever, I was cool with that. So fast forward a month and a half: US Airways cancels our flights for some reason so we had to rebook everything on American Airlines. I get the charges on my MasterCard and look, there is that pesky 150$ travel agent charge again. It’s not my fault the airline cancelled my tickets, why should I pay this fee again?

I asked her why I was being double charged and she answers with “This is the price of doing business. This is how I get paid”. My ass it is. I know full well you make a salary and what, so the airline cancels our flights again or maybe even again? Are you going to keep charging me this fee cause that’s b.s. Anyhow, after a few heated e-mails I now see that the refund is back on my card…ha ha ha biatch. North South Travel sucks don’t use them.

It’s not really all that hard people

I thought I read somewhere that Canada has a 98% literacy rate or something. I guess the entire nation’s 2% of illiterate people ride the Skytrain on a daily basis. There are signs everywhere in the stations posted by the numerous escalators to “Walk Left, Stand Right.” You’re holding everybody up by standing in the middle and refusing to move. Those signs are there to promote traffic flow. Oh, girl in the white boots with the pink frilly corduroy skirt, you should really wear underwear when going out in public or learn to stand on an escalator with your legs crossed…

Classless bling posts

Why do women change their Facebook or MSN Messenger picture to that of their engagement ring? Don’t get me wrong, I remember how excited I was when I got engaged and I love looking at other girl’s rings too but to create an entire Facebook album entitled “My Ring” is just plain idiotic if you ask me. Get over yourself. As Si Si says, "it's crass and classless."

Canadian $ on a rampage

This goes out to my colleague who has to announce every 15 minutes to everyone in 'Cubeland' about how the Canadian dollar is ‘really kicking some ass’. Yeah, it’s fantastic news alright... 250,000 people were laid off from manufacturing jobs Canada-wide this year, people are buying new cars in the States to save some money thus taking a $50,000 purchase out of the local economy 1 car at a time, tourism is at an all time low as it's cheaper for people to stay at home and ski/shop then to come up here like they used to, oh, and you know what the best part is? I still get to pay a 30% mark up on most products on our local shelves as we have not made the necessary adjustments up here yet. Yeah, rock on, go Canadian dollar; idiots.

Annoying Person Habit #4598-9876b

People who think they are good at impersonating accents but in fact, really suck at them. You may think that you sound Italian, Scottish, German or even like Borat for the joke you are telling me for ohhh, the 4th time this week but I hate to tell you that your Fat Bastard sounds kinda like a Newfie and your Borat sounds likes he’s from Montreal.

High 5's are gross

So apparently, 1/3 men fail to wash their hands after going to the washroom, compared to 1/8 women, say researchers who covertly monitored users of public washrooms throughout several cities in the U.S. First of all, eeeew but does anyone else find their collection methodology disturbing, or is it just me?

Take me to your leader

In order to get to my place of work, I must take the elevator to the 17th floor and then walk up to the 18th penthouse floor. Now, I have learned many things since I started working here and one of them is this; I always thought that Ecclesiastical was some kinda Christian church/sect/whatever, but according to the rules of Bentall, Ecclesiastical actually means “pushy little gossiping Chinese women who budge and push people out of the way to get on the elevator first”. They glare at people who get off on lower floors and make loud remarks such as “Doesn’t this building have stairs?" For being a group of Christians selling insurance, one would think they would be a nicer, more polite group of people wouldn't you think?

Good marketing? Lazy parents?

Every time I turn on the television there are ads for all sorts of diapers: Pampers Cruisers, Easy Ups, Baby Dry’s, ones that get cold when you have an accident, etc. What is with this? I know, I know, I’m not a parent but it strikes me as pretty fucked up if your kid can not only tell you that their diaper is freezing cold and wet, they can wash their own hands with the Kandoo soap, etc, but they still don’t have the wherewithal to figure out when to use the potty? Pretty soon the commercials will show teenagers asking to borrow mom’s car and then pan over to a package of diapers made ‘just for your teen’…

Here...let me give YOU a tip!

Tip jars at places like Flying Wedge Pizza, Blenz, Subway? Are you kidding me? I am sick and tired of tip jars all over the damn place. Why should I feel like I have to tip someone for doing something that they are already being paid to do? They are not like a server in a restaurant who may go out of their way to ensure that your meal is just the way you want, clean up any spills and cater to your crazy whims and dietary needs all with a smile on their face when all they really want to do is slap you silly. Counter people are low rent humps who for the most part are sullen, surly, and slow. Why should I be guilted into supplementing your low paying job?

Overreacted?

A Surrey woman who previously took in abused pit bulls was attacked by two of them on Sunday afternoon when they turned on her in her own home. As she was being mauled, an RCMP officer coming to her rescue made a quick decision and shot one of the vicious pit bulls. The victim and her family are now criticizing the officer’s actions and want her to know that their children are now having nightmares about the killing of their dog. Are you kidding me?? I would rather they have memories of that than memories of their mother being torn apart by 2 vicious dogs! That RCMP officer made the right decision and spared that woman further injury, she could at least be grateful. Pit bulls were bread to kill, attack and maul…any asshole who keeps them in a home, especially a home with small children should be put down along with their ‘precious’ pit bull.

This city has gone to the dogs

There is this guy who has two huge Great Danes in the West End and I always see him allowing his dogs to drink from the water fountain in the park on Chilco Street. Those fountains are for people, not for dogs. Don't get me wrong here, I love dogs and I know that they need water but why not bring along a bottle of water for your dog instead of allowing them to slobber all over the park fountain? And don't tell me 'dogs have less germs than humans', whatever, I do not see many humans giving the communal fountain some tongue like your huge ass Great Danes seem to enjoy doing, yeccch.

Kids these days

I was watching the local news tonight and they had a story about these raging soccer mums in some bumpkin place near Kelowna. They were raging because their children lived in the schools catchment area and had to walk 4km to school instead of catching a free ride on the school bus (school buses which are full of children who actually live FAR away). First off, walking is not going to kill you, it’s good for you. Second of all, you knew when you bought your home that you lived within the set catchment area and knew damn well that the school bus did not service your area…why are you acting so surprised now?

Funny enough, the very next piece talked about how this generation of children and teenagers are the fattest ever and how their life expectancy would be lower than that of their parents. It showed a class of Vancouver school kids exercising and then the camera panned in on one girls set of very chunky legs; can you imagine being that poor little girl in the purple stretch pants? She probably raced home thinking that her and her class would be on t.v. that night and instead she saw that she was singled out as the token fat kid…so cruel.

The spawn of Paris

Paris Hilton (who is currently single) vows to have children by the end of next year. Since when did babies become the must have accessory item? It seems that so many immature people are having babies lately (hello Nicole Ritchie, yeah, I'm talking about you). If you are not responsible now, what are the chances that you will become more responsible once baby arrives? You should already be responsible and perhaps even in a relationship before getting knocked up. At least she has money and will not have to suck off her parents for the baby necessities but Paris procreating is a scary thought. I really think that people should have to take an exam before they can get pregnant.