Sometimes it's the little things in life that can bring us happiness. Take for instance when the Broadway B-line driver pulls up to the intersection at Granville and Broadway during a long red light and lets us off on the east side of Broadway so that we can all make our connection onto the Granville St. B-line much easier; you truly rock Mr. bus driver!
Grrrreat, thanks to reading my pal SiSi's blog, I now have the song "Funky Cold Medina" in my head. Can't....get....it.....out! Thanks buddy.
For those who know me at all, you know that when I’m hungry I get reeeeally owly in a hurry. There have been some memorable times/showdowns at Ikea and elsewhere all brought on by low blood sugar and the need for some food, quick! The man and I were discussing the owl scale the other night, basically if I am a bit hungry, I am a little owly/cranky but if I am starving then I am a raging bitch/full fledged owl and get snippity and sarcastic (yes, more so than normal!) I take comfort in knowing that there are others out there like me; Rena, my work colleague is similar when it comes to hunger and there have been a few times when we have had to snap at our lunch crew in order to get moving towards the food. Good times.
I know that it’s been snowing like a mofo for a while now but come on people, shovel your damn sidewalks already, I am tired of almost falling down and breaking something because you are a lazy mofo and can’t clear a 2’ by 10’ piece of your sidewalk. If you don’t do it while it’s still snow, then it’ll turn into ice and then the real fun begins for all of the innocent pedestrians. And for the record; people on the east side of 11th appear to be more diligent than the west side of 11th Avenue…one would think what with all of your fancy houses and cars over there on the west side that you could afford a friggin’ snow shovel from Crappy Tire.
My morning bus rolls down Main St. and Hastings every day and I am always kind of amazed that when we pass Victory Park and the cenotaph, that the wreaths laid down on Remembrance Day are still all there. Hastings/Main is known to be the worst postal code in Canada yet the drug addicts, homeless and other crazies all seem to respect the cenotaph and the wreaths, good on them really.
I trudged through the snow yesterday to get groceries at my beloved local mall; It’s technically called Kingsgate Mall but everyone lovingly refers to it as Hellsgate Mall because it’s pretty damn ghetto. I was stopped in my tracks though when I caught a glimpse of the mall Santa. He was perched on the shoddiest Santa chair ever surrounded by the most pitiful picket fence I have ever seen in my life; it’s like they pulled all the props for the area from a reject bin behind Goodwill or something. Santa’s beard was matted and nicotine stained; in fact, I think he is the dumpster diver that I see behind the Best Western most mornings…nice to see that they have hired locally. Anyhow, if you want this years Santa picture for your kidlets to be extra entertaining, bring them all down to my mall, it's well worth the drive!
Since when did fishnet stockings become ‘office appropriate’ hosiery? I work in the downtown core and I am seeing a lot of fishnet as of late. They look cool for going out at night and all but in the office they tend to look a bit trashtastic. Unless you’re one of those escort lunch date with a CFO sorta girls, I’d leave them behind if I were you.
I am all for human rights but I am starting to see why some states chose the route of forced sterilization at one point in history. WTF were these parents thinking? Hopefully they are putting aside a little bit of cash from each welfare cheque for little Adolf to change his name when he is a bit older because I can see that name being a barrier to finding gainful employment. Hopefully his sister with the middle name “Aryan Nation” will fare a little bit better…
Umbrellas in the snow ranks right up there with another strange Vancouver tradition of those crazy ass full face visors that Asian people wear here all summer. Have people never heard of wearing a hat? It seems kind of absurd to walk around with an umbrella because of a few snowflakes falling from the sky doesn't it?
Typical 'Couv weather this morning, it was absolutely pissing down rain and the trolley bus pulls up with it's usual 'bus full' sign on the front, grrr. However today, a whole whack of people got off at Broadway so the bus driver actually let us board the bus, hooray! The bus driver greeted each and every person with a genuine "Hello, good morning" to which most people stopped in their tracks, rubbed their eyes and actually greeted him right back. People were thanking him as they got off the bus and nobody was pushing and shoving, I can easily say that it was the nicest bus ride I have had in ages. You rock Mr. Bus Driver, thanks for making our commute a nice one.
This one should be filed under my 'what the fuck' file, if such a file existed. We were driving through traffic today and pulled up alongside a typical family minivan. Upon closer inspection though, I could see that besides a mom, dad and children in the van, there were those naked lady stickers plastered all over the sides of the family van, what the???
Ever since the Kingsway Honda dealership lit up their red sign next door, I feel like we’re living in the Seinfeld episode when Kramer commented on ‘heading back to the Red Planet’ when the Kenny Rogers Roasters turned on their sign with gigantic red neon chicken atop the roof. The bright red chicken light took its toll on Kramer's sleeping schedule so he switched apartments with Jerry. I think that I’ll just invest in some decent curtains seeing as there is no one in our building that I know well enough to propose such a solution to though; that or hang a huge-ass banner from my window protesting the dealership like Kramer did...
I take the bus to work every day. More often than not, it will be pissing down rain and the bus will go whizzing by my stop with the “Bus Full” sign on the front leaving us all stranded for another 10-20 minutes until another bus has room to cram us all on like sardines. To add further insult to injury, the bus sometimes has those cheeky-ass messages that only add to my rage as the bus goes flying by: Go Lions Go, Go Canucks Go, grrrrrrrrrr. And HEY, if you wear a backpack on the bus, you're an automatic asshole. Take it off already and stop hitting people in the face with your stupid crap. 
I get it, your new winter jacket is cashmere, oooooooh. But that tag on the sleeve that was there when you bought it is supposed to be cut off once you take it home from the store; instead, you look like a complete tool walking around with your “Hey! Wanna impress all your friends with this cashmere jacket?” tag still on.
Now that I live in East Van, I notice that people actually lock up their belongings with great fervor. But seriously, what is up with those car alarms that have like 4 different sounds? There is the traditional “beep, beep, beep” followed by the air raid siren sound, followed by the police siren’ish one and then it finishes up with the flock of Canadian geese sound. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? Is that really necessary?
Yes, your life and your time are far more important than the server behind the counter getting your morning coffee for you, a-hole. On a nearly daily basis I am left shaking my head at people’s complete lack of manners and disregard for common decency. If you are being served by someone, hang up your damn cell phone already and talk to them like the human being they are, they not your servant and no one is impressed by your conversation; your cheap polyester suit already shows me that you are a complete wank at best.
I am not going to rag on about the popular vote and how unfair first past the post can be as I will look like a huge whiner seeing as my party lost *sniffle* but I am going to give a huge shout out to Québec for saving us from a much worse fate. Last night Harper and his Conservatives came dangerously close to obtaining a majority government but thanks to our Québécois friends voting for the Bloc, Serial killer Harper is stuck with yet another minority government. I find it quite ironic that a sovereigntist party saved Canada yesterday but they did and we should all thank them profusely.
I was watching tv with the man last night when a commercial came on for A&W. They were introducing a new sirloin burger called “The Uncle Burger”. This adds to their ‘family’ line up of: Papa Burger, Mama Burger, Teen Burger, etc. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? Is it just me or is someone at A&W a wee bit f’ed up? I think their product and branding managers are cannibals or something.
