Keep it to yourself

If you wake up and are hacking, wheezing and have a sore throat, FFS, please stay home and don't come into the office and inflict the rest of us with whatever plague you've dragged in. No one here is impressed that you've managed to make it in today. Yes, we'll talk about you if you take a sick day and assume that you're watching Maury Povich, shopping in the U.S. or skiing, but trust me, we will be talking even more shit about you if you get us all sick.